Aug 20th: Don't look

I was hanging out with a friend, Joe (who I've almost had somethong with but never even kissed, because I'm afraid that if I do something the friendship will end). We were at his place and I was teying not to do anything with him, until suddenly he decided to take a shower, and did not in any way try to hide anything. I did not want to see him naked, since I still have that fantasy about having sex the first time with a guy without seeing or touching his penis before he puts it inside. He was talking to me the whole time and about us having sex and at the end it was impossible not to look at him, at all, while talking, so I saw all of his body, and it was not quite what I had expected... He was so pale, and his penis normal size but quite thin for his bodytype...